Asking Your Divorced Friends for Advice on Marriage

At first glance, the thought of asking a friend who has gone through a divorce may sound quite crazy, after studies however there is a chance that they may be some of the best people to talk to. According to The Wall Street Journal, divorced people tend to spend more time on the lost relationship deciding what went wrong. Through different studies, they have concluded that the average divorcee shares five regrets that they have from their marriage, with the resolve of being different when they hopefully get their second, or third, chance at marriage.

One of the first tips would be do what it takes to make your spouse happy, or boost their spirits. This can be done by showing affection of some sort, whether it is compliments or cuddling or the simple yet powerful “I love you”, showing your support for them is extremely important in your marriage. This can’t be sporadic; it should be a normal part of your everyday routine, to be each other’s greatest cheerleaders. Second, discussing money matters is important, don’t shove them under the rug and act as if they are nonexistent, the dust bunny will just continue to grow. Discuss how to spend and save, and work as a team because studies show that money problems and disagreements is the leading cause for divorce. Third, figure out a good way to move on from the past. Whether this includes past relationships or arguments from last week, work things out and then promise to move on.

Communication and forgiveness are significant characteristics of a healthy marriage. Fourth, don’t blame each other for every problem, if it is a difficult day figure out ways to cope together; don’t shove the issue on your spouse as if your being tired is their fault. Lastly, and most importantly, communication is essential! Chose to talk things through, promise each other that both will have a chance to share an opinion before making a decision. In that communication do so in a loving and understanding manner, not judgmental or annoyed. Working through these few things may just help your marriage in the long run.